In defense of my mood and my behavior today:

So for the record, I did not “overreact.” I mean, when you think about it, saying I overreacted is just you judging my reaction, and who the hell are you to do that? I just “react”ed. That happens all the time. Also, I did not “throw my shoe at your head” as much as sort of go to kick your foot under the table, friendly like, and my shoe came off. Into your body. But you’ll have a very hard time proving intent, I think. I was trying to help, you were for sure about to make things worse and I distracted you. Also, I have tiny adorable ballerina feet, so I am not buying your act about how that hurt.

I’m super happy to hear all your personal problems all day – don’t worry about the fact that my door is closed and my speaker phone is on, it’s definitely not more important than whatever you’ve got going on. Come on in, I’m glad you didn’t knock and instead just gave me the puppy dog eyes through my window. It’s not work related? No, that’s even better. I am free to judge you this way, tell me more.