Who else thinks this is an outrage? No one? Just me? Okay.

This is relatively old news by now, but I can’t get over it. I literally can’t get over it. The Oxford English Dictionary has just updated the definition of “literally” to include “metaphorically”. I’m not making this up, it is true – in fact it was done over a year ago but no one noticed until now. What is happening to us? Why do we continuously pander to the stupidest among us? I am not the grammar police (oh my god, how great would it be to be the grammar police?), but seriously??? They couldn’t give us this ONE THING? I mean, metaphorically is actually the opposite of literally. It’s an antonym. An ANTONYM!!! Why would the English language standard for grammar do this to me? I feel like it’s a test. How much stupidity can we handle without literally imploding? I mean, I understand that normal people don’t read dictionaries at night while they are watching television, but I do. I love words, I love dictionaries and I feel like we are just giving up now. Let’s all just split our infinitives and use “irregardless” in casual conversation because the world is LITERALLY coming to an end.

Anywho. I just posted the full first chapter of my book and now I wait. I’m terrified. I have re-read it twenty times, and every time I do I hate it more, and just want to give up and start over, but it is two full months of work and I think that I’m just freaking out over nothing. I finally read it one last time for spelling and grammar and threw it up on the board, and I will now spend the next two days obsessively waiting for feedback. Please be kind, classmates.